Nothing Good Has Happened Yet
by MissingMissUnique
Summary: Hey. If Alice didn't come back then, and Bella gave up on life who would save her ? Jake ? Charlie ? Or would a vampire get her ? Ok crappy Summary, but please REVIEW!
1. Chapter 1

The sea below her was far enough away to look black and menacing. Bella didn't know what those murky waters held but it really wasn't what she was looking for, there was no way he could have been in there.

She breathed deeply, soaking in the atmosphere of the moment; her heart was racing as if it were whole instead of broken into a million tiny peice, Bella almost felt whole. As she pulled her arms high above her head she pushed the 'almost' to the back of her mind. Her eyelids fluttered shut as the wind continues to gain strength and whip at her hair and clothes, there was a split second in which she felt like she could fly.

Slowly, she tip toed to the edge of the rock, where it was cleanly cut and air was the only thing that followed. Her arms fell to her sides as the anticipation became nervous, it was a massive drop and she herself knew that her own fragile body had a small chance of survival.

Another deep breath.

Take it slowly.

Lift the left foot.

It was her brain that followed her heart this time, her brain let common sense and instinct subside in the place of all the pain and hurt that her heart had taken, her heart was owed this, this last wish.

Bella's left ankle hovered in the mid-air just off the cliff, no one could see her, so there was no one to stop her. After all the one person that could fix all this was distracted by new things. Her mind flashed back to the first day at Forks; "you're the shiney new toy" Jessica had said. The shiney new toy that everyone got bored with eventually.

Another deep breath.

It was time to do this, it was too hard on Jake and Charlie, too watch her slowly disappear, to worry whenever she was out of the room and watch her whenever when she could bear to handle , she'd seen the posters in the record stores, "It's better to burn out than fade away"

Another deep breath.

**_Bang!_**

Bella crashed down onto the ground, instinctively her hands went to her face and she rolled onto her stomach. Her brain could still not calculate what had happened and how she got there, but then again, she was used to falling over.

There was a ringing in her ears that was so loud that she only began to hear the velvet voice half way through his rant,

"-being ridiculous, I didn't give you a chance at normality so th-"

**_Bang!_**

There was a weight on top of her back, crushing her chest into the mud, it felt like her ribs were about to snap even though her lungs were completely empty.A few minutes later what she pressumed to be a rock rolled off of her. Air flooded into her deprived body and she coughed in shock, her body started to shake as she tried to sit up. She was still in danger but no matter how sure Bella was that Victoria was about to kill her, there was simply no adrenalin rush that could get her vertical just now. As she collapsed back onto the ground Bella's final thoughts wandered to Edward and why even his voice had abandoned her in the this time of need.

She continued coughing uncontrolably, like her body was rejecting the air that her lungs force fed it, with this Bella realised that no good was going to come of her continuing to fight, even her imagination had left her alone on this desolate rock, with what would probably be her arch-enemy standing over her crippled and weak body.

As this feeling set in and Bella accepted her fate and used her final energy to roll onto her back and splutter,

"Victoria, do what you like now, but I'm too broken to beg" A silence followed her defiant final words and Bella took it that Victoria had been shocked at her willingness to give in.

The shaded figure stood above Bella, blocking the tiny amount of light coming from the sky, which was now overcast with rolling grey clouds.

After a few minutes, Bella could feel herself relax, though her brain still knew that she was in fatal danger, the end of her life nearing. She tried to sit up, shaking her head as she tried to wake up, still holding her arms above her in defense of the venomous predator.

More time passed, neither of them spoke or moved. It wasn't the uneasy silence that you would think would be unavoidable with this kind of situation, (y'know when the person you've been running from for a year is about to kill you). There was just something about the atmosphere that comforted Bella, maybe it was because the end was near and the struggle was over, maybe it was because she knew there were worth ways to die, she may even have held on to the faint glimmer of hope that she could be changed, even after all this time. For a reason that was only known to her, Bella looked up, then stood up, and willingly accepted her fate.

There was indeed a venomous predator in front of her, one that had tried to kill her previously, one that she knew would love to drain her at this very moment.  
Bella, being the danger magnet that she was, took a step toward it and whispered knowing that he would still hear..

"Jasper."

And then she broke out in tears, and cried, letting the soothing tears flood over her cheeks and face as if they were stroking it. Though they weren't tears of joy, they still signalled a deep relief.

For a second he simply watched her, internal conflicting mounting as whether he could handle comforting her or not, all alone, here, on the desolate beach..  
Then there was a crash from the woods, and a dramatic howl. Bella choked on her words and they caught in her throat, Jasper took one last look at her,  
"Tonight. ", and with that he backflipped off of the cliff face and into the water below, she only caught the ripple of white as he streaked into the deep waters.

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**_A.N - Please review this guys, I really want you to be involved in the writing for this one, I know how I want it to end but how are we going to get there?? haha...I need 5 reviews AT LEAST before I post Chapter 2._**

Love you all xxx


	2. So, this is new

**_A.N - Hey, this is a short chapter, sorry. I've spending a lot of time on my music and my other stories.  
Please Review. 1st person get a cyber hug :P xx_**

Bella's state could be described as nothing less than hysterical, she cowered at the top of the cliff from an invisible evil. Jacob knew nothing

The bursting from the wood had been due to sheer excitement and Jasper's scent had been masked by the salty sea which even overpowered his nose on a regular basis.

But he had heard Bella's howls and they caught his heart, pulling it up into his throat. He sprinted over and clutched her, unable to query about her upset until she calmed down. Sobs wrecked her body and she struggled to breathe.

They spent an hour like this, comforted by one another's embrace for different reasons. Bella saw him as her sun, a sense of warmth and even safety passed over her whenever they were together. But she was not one to worship the sun, or use sunny days to heal scars from the past. "A tan looks good on the outside, but only the outside" she thought silently as he breathed into her hair.

Finally he whispered, "Bella honey, what's wrong?"  
She tried to laugh through the remaining hiccups of her hysteria; how could he ask that? Her life had been left in shreds, he was all she had left and everyday she had to turn him down as second best. But she never wanted that from him, she was just lonely and it had mutated into a relationship. Would it hurt him? When she left, would he forget like she never could? It was a complex situation and she didn't have a clue what to do.

There was no way out of the hole that she'd fallen into.  
But then there was, because Jasper was back, even if he wasn't. There was a new sense of hope and she had to know what he had come back for; that was what she was going to find out. Now.

Suddenly, she shrugged off Jacob's clutch and got to her feet, hiding the slight wobble that she had. Slwoly she stumbled towards the path that lead down to the beach.

"Um....Bella?" Jake called after her, once again confused and in the dark about what she was thinking. A lot of people stuggled with that..  
"Yes, Jake ?" her voice was innocent to the point of sarcasm. Thought she treid to smile as she turned to him, her stelly look made him reluctant to continue.  
"Where are you going Bells?" his face was contorted in confusion.  
"Home " she answered flatly.  
"You don't have to do that, you can stay with me tonight, I can drive you t-"  
She cut in, "Thanks but it's not necessary Jake."  
"Oh, well, stay a bit longer?" there was an obvious hope in his puppy dog eyes, "please?"  
"I'm going straight home Jacbo, don't worry I'll call you tomorow" It was t he final word. She marched off in the direction of her truck. Lying to people was easy these days.

Bella drove through Forks keeping to the back roads as much as possible. The sun was setting but the onset of darkness subdued her racing heart. She had often gone to the Cullens house in the dead of night, and even then it was always bright and spacious.

The woods thickened and she turned up her headlights to make out the unused path. She was driving up to the his house, to meet the last vampire that had tried to bite her. Bella pushed this to the back of her mind, letting the truck's rumblings drown out her worries. Finally she reached the top of the hill, and looked up at the mansion. Her throat fell to her stomach, or her stomach rose to her throat, she couldn't be sure.

_Another deep breath._

Bella balled up her hands and marched towards the large doors, for a few seconds she stood glaring at it, willing it to open on its own or ring it's own bell.

_Another deep breath._

She threw her fists into the door and thumped it. Then she waited.

In less than a second the door was opened by another familiar face.

_Another deep breath._

She reluctantly wandered into the house.

* * *


	3. Fate Brings Us Together

"Hello Bella" he smiled warmly as we walked through the house. "It's nice to see you Jasper." The new, friendly vibes that he was giving off were slightly daunting to her as she followed him.

They walked through the house, the dusty surfaces and lack of warmth were painful reminders to Bella about the absence of the home owners. But there was too much that she had to find out from Jasper for her to get upset now. He glanced back at her with a wary eye, almost showing an inner conflict. The living room looked much more like usual, there were indentations in the sofas from where people had been sitting, and the pillows were assembled in a much more personal way; even the ash in the fire place was still glowing.

Jasper gestured towards the couch beside the fire place, and left the room, not before sending a wave of relaxation over her. Bella leant back against the couch, feeling safe for the first time in a too long. She looked up at the wall and noticed a number of photos that hadn't been there before, mostly of Alice but there were a few of the others too. Just in the corner, above Esme, was **him**. Bella let out a short gasp and Jasper came sprinting back into the room, nearly covering her with the food he had been preparing,  
"Bella what's wrong?" his tone was unmistakably anxious as he followed her gaze to the picture. Without another word he put the food down beside her and travelled at lightning speed to the wall. He moved to take down the photo but Bella wouldn't let him, she jumped up, spilling the rice everywhere and dashed over, "No, I want to see him, I need to see him." After a deep look at her Jasper stepped back, out of the way and went to clean up the food, sighing slightly.

Bella stared up at the face from her dreams, but he was so different. The rings around his eyes looked so deep that they could have been permanent, his eyes were flat black; had it been any other Cullen then she would have been scared to look at it but she simply couldn't take her eyes off him. She reached up and stroked his face, amazed at how the cold glass felt so much like his own skin. Now, she knew what she wanted, she realised why she came here and had taken all the risks to do so, Bella still needed Edward. Jasper cleared his throat and knocked her out of the dream.

She sat back down on the couch and watched Jasper settle himself onto the adjacent seat. Finally he looked back at her, seeing that she was full of unanswered questions and realised that this was going to be harder than he had previously thought. For a few minutes they both just sat, unsure how to start and Bella grew more and more worried that the mask she was wearing would break and show how bad this truly was. Eventually, she began,

"Jasper, I'm a little confused to say the least, I never thought I would see you again and then suddenly you're right there in front of me. I realise that this must be quite hard for you as well but I **need** answers, I can't go on living like this, I simply can't survive. Obviously you've not come back with the others and I guess that's sensible, I could use a little more time if I have to get over.....him."

"Bella...." he paused and looked down at the floor, she'd never seen him this agitated. "I'm so sorry." he finally finished, looking up with heartbreaking eyes. Her broken soul took one look at him and let the first tear fall, she was spent.

She weeped for hours, as he carried on, he didn't really have any options. Though he had tried to soothe her, the grief was simply too much for her body to bear and he chose to just talk.

"Bella, I'm ashamed at what I have done, for so many reasons. I love you as much as the rest of my family by the way, and the self loathing I've experienced because of the last time we met has been eating me up inside. My brother, needless to say, was even worse. Edward chose to stay away from the family as much as possible, when he became too weak to keep up the pretense he would come home and sit in his room all day. We had all hoped that he would eventually move on. We all tried to not think about you but you were so huge to us." he paused a little hear, offering Bella a second box of tissues. "He couldn't forget you at all, one morning we found him outside at 3am, setting fire to the piano. Bella, he needed you so badly, I'd never felt someone in so much pain, that is, until now." he gestured to her own frail body. "It's clear that you've not been coping either; and to be perfectly honest, I had no idea what to do. When I saw you this morning, so close to the edge, I could feel that you had given up." With that he resigned himself to silence and slumped back against the couch, sighing in exhaustion and frustration.

Slowly, Bella regained control over herself and sat up, crossing her legs beneath her. Jasper opened his eyes and glanced at her as she cleared her throat.  
"Jasper, I came here looking for all the answers, I wanted to really know why you came back, especially alone; but if I don't think that you really know either. About..._him_...well I think he probably needs more time to find his distractions and what not. Maybe if you take him on a hunting trip- "

"Bella he's not eating!" Jasper hissed getting to his feet, Bella cowered behind a pillow. "We don't know what to do! Even Carlisle's at his wit's end! I've come back to beg you to forgive us, I know that we shouldn't have made a fuss of your birthday, and our family has put you in so much dang-"

"Wait, Jasper, you want _**my**_ forgiveness ?" Bella said, clearly completely and utterly confused. Hadn't they become bored of her? "I thought Ed-..._he_ was bored of me, and you all hated babysitting me. I guess Alice leaving hurt a bit but then you all have distractions..." she muttered, remembering the intense abandonment she had felt that night, and for the rest of the year. "Jasper, you know I'm ready to give up, please don't give me false hope. If I have hope that comes to nothing, it would be the end of me.

"Bella, this **was **my fault, Edward loved you so much and I had to take him away from you"

"No! Jasper, don't blame yourself; it was his choice after all." Bella once more looked at the floor, knowing full well that Jasper could feel the tears falling but still clinging to enough dignity to hide them.

In what felt like slow motion he walked over to her frail body, but he paused behind her, struggling to know what to do. It was clear that her intense pain had brought back many of his human instincts. Ever so slowly he placed a cold hand on her shoulder, the closest he had ever been to her, or any human without lusting for their death.

This caught Bella by surprise and she shook for a second, before he sent calming vibes out to her. As they took effect Jasper took the plate of leftover food from her and returned it to the kitchen.

When he returned Bella had curled up into the foetal position, her eyelids drooping. He looked at the clock on the wall and gasped in dismay at what he saw. It was one Am. Charlie would be having a fit, the possibility of Bella telling him she was coming here was minimal at best. As her eyes flickered shut Jasper coughed loudly. She stood up abruptly, rubbing her eyes and reaching for her keys.

"I. . . I have to go" she stated, avoiding eye contact and holding an uncomfortable posture.  
"Bella, it's one Am, what do you plan on saying?" Jasper queried, checking she had a plan and was awake before letting her drive. If he was the cause of her death this time Edward would pull his limbs off.

"I'll tell him that I went to Angela's and we got carried away watching movies. He won't mind. I don't think." she chewed on her lip, clearly unsure as to how he would actually react. Jasper sighed but followed her to her truck. He watched her get in and turn it around before driving up to him again.

"Uhm...thank you for tonight, it's...given me a lot of help." she said, whilst winding down her stiff window. As she went on to twist her hands on the steering wheel. It squeaked, only increasing the awkwardness of the moment. "and er..thanks for saving me today too."

"You're welcome Bella." Jasper's voice was cold yet sincere, he felt as awkward as she did. "Tomorrow's Sunday, right ?" he continued, "maybe you could come over again. I think I can finally fix this."  
"Well I'm working in the morning but tomorow afternoon I'm free." she replied, still staring down at her squirming hands, as if she could make them stop by looking at them. Jasper gave a quick nod as she pulled away,  
"Thanks for listening Bella" he mumbled, but her truck had already disappeared.

As he walked back into the house he took something out of his jacket pocket and dropped it on the small hall table.  
It was a crisp white envelope that had, "dearest Bella" in a beautiful cursive lettering. Unmistakably Edward's.

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**_AN - Hey, the next chapter might take a while to update because it's already been written but I can't actually get my hands on it. Anyway, here are some awesome songs that I used to help me write this one.  
_**  
Slipped Away - Avril Lavingue  
IN LOVING MEMORY - ALTERBRIDGE


	4. If Everything Was Crystal, What Then?

**AN : So, this chapter's important. The whole story was inspired by a letter that was written for me by my personal Edward. I've used a lot of that in this chapter, so thanks.  
The Italian means : "Death seemed Sweeter To Him  
Songs To Look out For : **Almost Lover, A fine Frenzy. Mona Lisa, All American Rejects.  
**Review ? Please ? Don't make me beg ? Shameless I know.**

**JPOV.  


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**

I spent must of the morning hunting but it turned to gluttony by seven Am and I ended up walking back to the house, slowly. The morning mist was still rising up the mountain, and the birds were singing in the trees. I sighed and remembered why I loved Forks so much, even though rain from the previous night had left the sky overcast.

The house was too quiet without the family though, especially without music; Edward had made it a major of our lives. This morning too, hunting felt so different without Emmett challenging us to get the biggest kill. We were still like kids in many ways. And of course, Esme and Carlisle, they were the heart of our family and I'm not sure that we could have survived without them. Even Alice and I had received a small amount of what some might call marriage counselling from them, it was impossible to escape it whilst living with them though.

Ah Alice, I miss her so much that it pains me constantly, cliched as it sounds, I feel like I am merely half of the man without her beside me. I doubt that anyone could understand or explain this feeling without being as in love as we were. Hah! Don't I just sound like a broken record of those vulgar love ballads.

There was a knock at the door, and I looked up at the clock, it was unusual for a vampire to lose track of time; it usually crawled along in our lives. But, sure enough it was midday and I could smell Bella's warmth as her heart paced. I felt light enough to skip on the other hand, overjoyed that she had actually returned, Edward did say she was a danger magnet, oh, how he would kill me if he knew of these affairs. I tried to give a calm facade as I opened the door, acting like I had been expecting her and couldn't hear how her heart accelerated when she saw my face. 'hmm, she used to do that with Edward' I thought silently, 'obviously for different reasons but it's still interesting'. Human emotions were so intriguing.

She walked quickly, again keeping her eyes on the floor and heading straight for the living room as if she was avoiding the rest of the house. I only allowed the look of worry to pass over my face for a second before sending more happy vibes her way; I'd never had to do this so much before. That's why I wasn't going to waste anytime.

Just like last time I sat on the adjacent sofa, trying to look less intimidating.  
"Bella, I know that we as a family have put you through hell over the past year and I cannot tell you how truly sorry I am for that. But I also promise you that Edward has been feeling just as much pain. I didn't just come back to escape my own discomfort and self loathing, I also came to give you this."

Her eyes were wide with confusion and amazement as I pulled the crisp white envelope from my inner pocket. "It's from Edward" I muttered, "but he never thought you would see it and I'd keep that in mind when you read it.." I handed it to her, well, pushed it into her frozen hand. It took minutes of her staring down at it before she looked back up at me.  
"Have you read it?"  
"No. It looked, private."

There was more silence, a longer silence. An awkward silence.  
"You don't have to read it here, you can take it home, or to a friends.."  
"Could I stay here ?" she cut in, "In his room, I'd like to read it there."  
I finally agreed, following her up the stairs. Bella gasped involuntary and her hand flew to her mouth, clamping it shut. I paced around the room, my arms folded, feeling astutely awkward.  
"Edward, uh...";My voice simply faded into nothing and we looked in different directions. Eventually, Bella walked, well stumbled over to one of the walls, where Edward's music collection had been. As she slid to the ground, I walked to the door, whispering,"Take as long as you want" just loud enough for her to hear.

I, unfortunately, knew exactly what the letter said, Alice had seen what he had written whilst he was in Norway and she couldn't help but tell me.  
_  
"Dearest Bella. I very much doubt these words will ever reach you as I refuse to break my promise, it will be as if I never existed. The way that God, if he exists, has planned for your life to be. I write this in the third person so that I may take a step back emotionally. Each of my attempts to write this in the first person failed miserably and simply left me a wreck. Finally, I swear to you that I do not exaggerate nor play down my feelings; with such minute chance of you receiving this, it would be too futile even for an idiot like me._

_He closed his eyes and rolled over, as though in doing so he had turned to face a different universe where she couldn't exist to him. As always, it didn't work. Her face was still there, the same joyful smile that grinned at him every night. He saw her face as it was back then; before he had hurt her, before he had destroyed himself, before the endless battles to distract himself that always ended in his personal demise._

_In his mind, she loved him, and he loved her. Everything else was unimportant. It was how it should have been, forever, how it could have been. Nothing could come between them though plenty had tried and it had felt like the whole world was against them. They would carry on regardless, safe in their unmatchable love, until death, though death now seemed like a more merciful option. As usual when he thought of her his mind recalled a phrase from the old Italian songs :  
gli sembro piu dolce anche la morte._

_It was simple really, as through the friction, the multitudes of past heartache, open wounds and complications, there was something that burned brighter than anything else ever could. They were, and had always been, utterly and uncontrollably in love with each other._

_This, he saw in her face, the face his mind had remembered in perfect detail for so long, memory undistorted by time or contemplation. She wore the same expression she had worn every one of the hundred or more times that he had gazed into her perfect eyes -that of hope of happiness, of glittering beauty and gentle warmth. He had never been an artist, but if he could paint anything in the world, her eyes were the only thing he would want to. Her face was made to draw him in, and her was powerless to resist. He would have died for that face, the one that he would have kissed without a seconds consideration._

_But now, that unfaltering image, that filled his every thought, was nothing more than a memory, a memory that lived alongside all the others of her. He wasn't for want of memories. Every moment they had spent together was imprinted on his mind and on his heart, if he had a soul it would long for the return of the times that those memories showed. He carried with him this constant record of the life he could have had were it not for a few decisions on either side. This life he saw and endured everyday, passing through his mind frame by frame, taunting, teasing, haunting him, until he could bear it no more. This was a torture unlike any other for it had no fathomable escape. He was destined to endure this forever and ever and ever._

_He wondered if he wanted to remember anymore; perhaps it would be better to try and forget rather than distract himself. The idea was inconceivable, almost repulsive. How could the most precious thing he had known, that which had shaped his being, be allowed to be so far from him? It had taken mere months to build his library of memories, but he was no closer to figuring out how to keep it without allowing it to devour him._

_He turned over on his couch once more, this time with a jolt of what was unmistakably anger. It wasn't fair, he argued to himself, that the only girl he ever loved was too fragile for him to touch, kiss, even be around. Her face returned and Edward sighed, accepting his fate and going to his piano which sat in the corner. He always played for her when he allowed himself to remember..._

_A mental image came to mind. They were at her house and he was sitting in the rocking chair. Bella was standing between his legs, her arms linked behind his neck; she had just been in his arms. The piano played soft background music as he allowed his mind to go deeper, mesmerised by how clear tonight's image was. This had been a particularly warm embrace, he could feel her heat, her arms, he heartbeat. As she rose she had looked into his eyes, and when she smiled a shiver raced over his usually impenetrable skin. Her eyes, as always, were inviting; drawing him in. In his mind, the scene continued, as her gaze won him over without the slightest effort on her part and he leaned in to kiss her neck. She giggled, and responded with a sound that must have been barely audible, telling him that she felt it too. He loved that little sound she made, in the same way he loved the way she laughed and said his name. Perhaps it was because she saved that laugh for when he kissed her._

_Back to reality, he contrasted the cold piano keys with what he had left behind, and was suddenly overwhelmed by the crushing weight of his loneliness. He was claustrophobic in this tiny new world once she had left. Edward wondered what he lived for. There was so much passion in him and so much ambition to court it, but without her to share it with his life had become worthless. It seemed selfish to have it._

_"Snap out of it" he shouted at himself as the piano music faded away. "You made your choice! You chose to keep her safe from you. You have to survive without her." It was pointless. He knew he couldn't fool himself into believing this. It didn't matter that she was probably different now. The truth was that he had never stopped loving her from day one, even though he was not there to protect or guide her. Maybe it was because he had never loved before, or maybe it was because she was so...perfect...but he would love her though and despite everything. Without her he merely drifted. "What good are the songs," he thought bitterly, "when you have no one to play them to?" He remembered the feeling of her breath on his neck as he played to her. Then, suddenly he realised he would never experience that again._

_The guilt and loss hit him hard, and he could not take anymore. With this, he took the piano outside, covered it in petrol and set it alight in a perfectly mechanical fashion. There was no peace to be found for him tonight, nor any other. He crumpled to the ground, wrapping his arms around his aching chest and curling into a tight ball as his family arrived and stood around the blistering heat. They all felt the emptiness that losing Bella had given him. As there thoughts started to unravel in his mind, Edward shut his eyes unable to take anymore. Tomorrow morning he would go to Europe._

Bella first dropped the tear soaked pages to the floor but then gathered them back up, pulling them to her chest as if she could claim Edward back from his words. She placed her cheek against the cold, hard ground and cried. There was nothing else she could do. Within minutes her phone buzzed, the caller ID flashing 'Jake'. She threw it across the room with the only energy she could give; it barely made the door. Once more she shut her eyes, pleading that he would come back, and then came a voice,  
"Bella?" It was high but not squeaky; Bella recognised it instantly but only opened her arms to Alice who raced over and clutched at her friend_._


	5. Forward Motion

Alice and Bella were still on the floor when Jasper came back having given them 'some space'; that is, enough space as Jasper could give anyone in the same building as him. They had spent the two hours in a tight embrace in the hope that it would console, comfort and calm Bella's tears. Fortunately, it had and as Jasper walked back in all that was left of her grief were the tear-soaked items and a few rogue hiccups. Now, she looked at Alice expectantly, still holding her hands as she waited for the story. Alice deliberated but gave in, realising that Bella had the right to know.

"Fine. But Jasper's going to tell me if you're becoming upset again." Alice looked at him floating at the edge of the room and he glided up to them, and also sat down on the clear floor. "A few weeks ago, I saw you jump off the cliff, but I knew it hadn't happened yet. On the same day Edward left again; he had just returned from Norway and I think he was going to Chicago next. He was in so much pain that just seeing his face made my heart break. But I also has Jazz to consider, he still felt completely responsible for us leaving as well as being exhausted from trying to make people feel better all the time. For a short time I didn't think I could help anyone but then Jazz thought up a plan.

You see, if we both left, with the possibility of Edward returning at anytime then it wouldn't be very discreet. Not only would it hurt the rest of the family even more but Edward would come here as soon as he realised. So, we told everyone that Jazz was going to visit Peter and Charlotte. Of course they all bought it thinking he needed time to rest from the family depression. Two days after his departure I told Esme that I missed him too much what with Edward being gone too and was going to join them. Then I packed my bags and drove here as fast as the Mercedes would go." She paused for a moment, waiting for Bella's nod before continuing.

"How did the letter get here?" Bella queried, her throat hoarse from crying so hard.  
"Oh! I stole that from Edwards room and slipped it into Jazz's pocket when I said goodbye to him,"Alice answered flatly, not a shred of guilt crossing her face. "Anyway. Rosalie phoned me a few hours ago and said that Edward was back. Though he probably won't ask, Esme will tell him where we are tonight and he should come straight here; he knows me too well not to." Bella was back to flinching every time his name was mentioned. Jasper's voice had been relaxing because she was unaccustomed to it.

Now, Jasper cleared his throat,  
"Alice, hon, I know that I had explained to you that Edward's pain was more than I had ever felt, but I must tell you that Bella's could easily match it. Even before I gave her the letter I was frightened that she may crumble to dust her emotions were so intense". The two vampires cast a wary eye over the fragile little human who was clearly exhausted, her head hanging low, eye lids drooping, she was even swaying slightly.  
"Bella, you need to go home. I'm in no doubt that Charlie will be home within the hour and you won't have told him you're here, have you?" Alice teased the information out of the shattered Bella who could only shake her head. "I'll drive, and then I'll cook for both of you. We'll decide later if you want Charlie to see me." The human was too tired to form an argument, she folded the letter and put it on the inside of her hoody. It was bound to be raining outside.

In the truck there was silence, which was unusual for Alice -especially with Bella. As they pulled up outside Bella's house it was roughly five o'clock, Charlie would be home soon and Bella immediately opened her door when the truck stopped. "Wait!" Alice nearly shouted it came out so sharply. Bella spun round, too shocked to speak.  
"You're always going to be part of our family Bella. Even when Edward's being a pig about keeping you safe. I know what he said to you in the woods, but even he was a bit surprised you believed him. I'm at a loss with the two of you sometimes but it's getting silly now; there's no need for you both to be miserable apart when you could be happy together -even if we need to be more careful."

"So, the only reason you left was for my safety ?" Bella's eyes depicted perfectly how joy and fury were wrestling in her heart. "Well yes, I mean he did it with the best intentions but he lied when he said he didn't love you." Bella could no longer contain herself, she kicked the door of the cab and jumped out, falling straight to her knees and screaming at the sky. Alice was there in less that a second though, dragging her kicking and screaming into the house.

She watched silently as Bella paraded around the living room, shouting her head off about Edward's paranoia. As she stopped to catch her breath she picked up the match box and the letter. Once again Alice was there instantly and had snatched the box out of her hand. Bella stared aghast before finally commenting, "You're an annoying little pixie" but she gave in and sat on the couch, pulling a cushion onto her lap and patting the space next to her. Promptly, Alice landed lightly next to her, her arm automatically falling over Bella's shoulders. "We can argue and discuss this later but Charlie's going to be home in twenty minutes and we have decisions to make. Now, does he get to see me or shall I come back when he's sleeping?"  
"No, I want you to stay!" Bella demanded, terrified of losing her once more. "Okay, calm down, Bella" Alice soothed, "I'll stay and I'll cook dinner for you and Charlie" she smiled, "You should probably go get a shower though; your face is still pretty red, and honestly, you kinda smell" Bella hugged her in response and Alice trotted to the kitchen.

A shower was exactly what Bella had required. Now, freshly changed, she followed the scents of tomato and basil. The radio was playing quietly but it was so unfamiliar to Bella that she couldn't focus on anything else. "What's the name of this song Alice ?"  
"It's Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol" Alice explained in between the lines she sung. Bella moved hesitantly to turn it up. "Charlie will be home soon," Bella said a little louder, "what have I made?" Alice snorted and pointed to the pan, "Pasta, with basil and with fresh tomato sauce, all vegetarian of course." At that, Alice stepped back from the cooker and began setting the table. Bella immediately took over the stirring of the sauce, instantly realising Charlie was about to walk in. Perfectly on cue the door clicked open.


	6. Simple Things

"Hey Dad, guess what?!" Bella's voice was saturated with enthusiasm, something that Charlie hadn't heard since the Cullens had left. 'Maybe Jacob and her are together now' he thought as he went to the room from which her voice had called. To his surprise, he didn't even need to ask about her news, it was sitting at the kitchen table. "Alice!" he cried, "You're back, I'm so glad...wait, are the others back?" he then looked at his daughter's mortified face and distraught face, "oh no! Don't answer that! I'm just glad you're back" he swooped down to hug her, pulling tight as if she was another daughter.  
"Thanks Charlie." Alice eventually smiled, just whispering, "I'm alone." into his ear. Though Bella already knew this her heart and and the hole tugged violently. "I take it you're staying with us for a few days then, but what about school?" Charlie continued. "Don't worry about any of that Chief" Alice replied in the sweetest voice, giving him an angelic salute, "Esme home schools us now. No one liked the new school."

Alice excused herself from dinner, putting it down to jet lag so Charlie and Bella went back to their bland and mindless conversations about his work. Bella merely grunted. They had been in these roles for too long for Bella to suddenly become talkative. But then, they had never had that relationship and Bella had a lot to think about tonight.

Afterwards, Bella and Alice headed upstairs, both of them immediately slouching onto the bed. For many, hours they had chatted about their lives apart from each other, hesitant to talk about the rest of the Cullens. Eventually, Bella nodded off to sleep with her vampiric friend sitting in the rocking chair that had once been claimed by someone other -he wouldn't be needing it again.

* * *

She knew it was 2am because her alarm clock glowed a dim green, only giving a few inches of light; Bella sat up, staring straight at the figure in the shadows. It looked odd, and seemed to rock slightly, her skin trembled.  
"Alice," she hissed, confused as to why the figure was yet to speak, maybe she was having visions. "Are you okay? What do you see?" Bella continued whilst searching for the light switch. She had not yet discovered it when the figure spoke, "Bella..."it whispered. Instantly Bella was cold, she threw herself backward to the top of her duvet, her eyes darting from clock to figure to window and back. As it stood she realised how tall the figure now was, it seemed to float as it came towards her; whispering things that her mind had blocked out. Death wasn't meant to come like this. 'Wake up, wake up!' she chanted silently, ripping both arms and screwing her eyes tight, She brought her knees to her chest, hissing into them all of the last words that she had used on the cliff. Why did they come now when Alice had just returned and she had hope once more ? Why not before the letter that had begun to heal her chest? Where was Alice? Was it not her turn to be the heroine ?

The thing had stopped moving, it simply stood at the edge of her bed. Reluctantly she opened her eyes, sacraficing the last of the courage she could gather. Now, as she fixed her eyes on to where she pressumed it's face was, it leant forward but also to the side. There was a feeble sounding click for the intensity of the situation that made. The light was first dim but it grew and illuminated the vampire. And then as it fell open, his hand went straight to her mouth, covering it all.

Silence almost fell, but Bella breathed through her nose in short, rasping breaths. There was no way that this was real. Gracefully Edward lifted his hand from her mouth and showed it to her before using it to stroke her face. He was treating her like a semi-feral pet. When she pulled at his hand he immediately let it drop but his face hung close enough to her own that she could feel his cool breath. It dizzied her. All of the anger and questions and affectionate quips that she had thought of whilst reading the letter were locked at the back of her brain and Bella could not tear her thoughts away from him to go and get them. Silence almost fell again. "I love you Isabella Swan and I beg you not to be afraid of me, not tonight." he said next, hus eyes boring in to hers as if he wanted to SEE her mind process the information. "I know that I am a monster with no right-"  
"Shh." Bella stopped him. There was a small smile at the corners of her mouth, If he made his speech now, he could be in a different continent by the next day. The small part that was left of the strong Bella could not allow that. "Hold me." she whispered. "Always" he promised her as he then took her in his arms and let her sleep peacefully. There was a lot of things to be said and even more for each side to apologise for, but that could wait for now. Edward inhaled her scent and settled into the embrace; never again would he give her up. He couldn't.


End file.
